Wednesday, March 20, 2013

My Facebook Life

O.K. I will admit it... My name is Karen and I'm a Facebook addict.  It's been 30 minutes since my last post and 30 seconds since I checked my notifications.

I am the Administrator of a Confessions Facebook Page.
I have a private Facebook Page that is for parents and those who are in any way connected to the autism community, where you can post statuses without your nosey friends and relatives being all up in your business.
I belong to a private Autism Bloggers group, with a bunch of chatty writers.  We share our blogs and statuses to do with life as a writer, and as a parent of someone with autism, as well as those who are actually living on and spectrum.  They are a one of the funniest groups of people I have never met. They are also a great group to procrastinate with.
I also belong to a few private groups for people with Aspergers and those who love someone who has Aspergers.
So yeah...Facebook has a habit of taking up a lot of my time.

As a matter of fact, in 2012 when I did this Year in Facebook Statuses App,  it revealed that on my personal page alone, I have written enough words for an entire book!  Shameful... I know.  Just think, If I spent all that time actually writing and publishing a book, maybe I'd be rich by now!  This year in review also revealed what I write the most about, politics (because of the election last year), mental health, and alcoholic beverages. Yep ...that's me in a nutshell!

So here is your chance to get to know me via some of my recent and favorite Facebook statuses.

"The people at Target should be shot for asking -did you find everything alright? Of course I found MORE THAN everything alright! That's why this bill is freakin $150.00 dollars!!!
Then they have the nerve to ask if you want to sign up for a credit card? #AreYouNuts?"

"Remember earth shoes? They were kinda ugly...but you feel like your walking on the moon. I love my new comfy, totally unsexy shoes."

"From the Editor of where I will be featured next week:
'You are a talented storyteller; one in a million. I think your stream of consciousness style is the best of any I have ever posted.'
My week has been made!"

"If you are single with no children I have some unsolicited advice for you...STaY that WaY as long as you can!"

"Great night with my hubby! Contract extended..."

"Talked to my Dad tonight.  I could hear his music all the way from L.A. (and I don't mean through the phone). Me -Dad are you trying to disturb your neighbors?  Him -These old mother -efers in this building can't hear!" 

"Seeing my doctor again.  Maybe she will commit me to a lovely mental health rehab this time.  I'm hoping for 30 days." 

"Dear God,
Thank you for the sunshine and my time with my God-children and dear friend today.  For my husband who I am so in love with Thank you for peace in this moment." 

Call from the groomers-"Mrs. K. Harry is ready to be picked up.  Just to let you know we are trying to close early today." In other words B*%#@ come get your dog!  Don't forget him this time!" 

"There is a certain danger in a drink tasting so good! Ruby red grapefruit juice and Ruby Red Absolute Vodka...and to all a good night." 

"Is it bad that I have two different computers open to facebook right now? #IMayHaveAProblem

"I think coffee is a bit like crack. There is nothing like that first sip. You spend the rest of the morning trying to get that feeling back...but it never happens...until the next day. #Andthereyouhaveit #answersoflifebyKaren"
"I have some awesome friends all over the U.S. & around the world. Some I have met through blogging but our connection is so beyond this medium. I'm feeling the love tonight. #YouGetMe #YouSeeMe #SoBlessed"
"I can be the sweetest person you'll ever meet, but if you mess with my kid, I can quickly turn into a bitch you wish you'd never met. Cole's math teacher is about to meet the other side of my personality. Don't worry...I will smile and be pleasant the whole time I am turning her world around. She's about to get a real education."

So what if I have 2 martini glasses and 1 wine glass in my bedroom. Maybe I was having a party up there. It it's a party of one...but I am damn good company!

Then of course there are also countless photos of my kids, my dog and my drinks!

I could go on all day! But I do have a life to live...well sort of.  I gotta get back to my Facebook!

In the comments below...leave me one of your craziest facebook statuses...or the one of mine you most identify with.