Thursday, August 2, 2012

Best Mom Ever?

My friend Roma is a middle school math teacher, a single mother of a beautiful, precious, smart little girl.  Roma was born in Cambodia and has lived here in the states since she was a little girl.  I love what she brings into my life via her culture and background.  Better yet, I love that she is taking the time and interest in my children enough to drag them kicking and screaming to go exercise.

When I would take Red myself, sometimes he would work hard, other times he wouldn't.  Many times, I couldn't even get him out the door.  I fight so many fights on a given day, that it didn't seem worth it to fight this one tooth and nail.

Everyday when Roma calls to say she's on her way, Red goes through his song and dance of excuses why he can't go.  She has none of it.  He whines and complains.   She totally ignores him.  She gets him to walk that track, walk the tread mill or elliptical to burn those calories, and release those endorphins.  He comes home with an elevated mood,  a little more self-esteem and a sense of accomplishment every time.  Her goal for him is to help him feel better mentally and physically.

If you've been reading this blog for long you know that he is dying to go out with "Hot Girls".  Unfortunately, between his medication and high carb diet, he has gained a bit of weight in the past two years.  He has no clue that he needs a lot more than a nice body to get ANY girl, but getting more fit will be a good start.

He listens to her so much better than he ever listens to me so, I give her the ball and let her roll with it. She does not accept "No" for an answer.

Her daughter has become like the little sister the boys never had.  She's smart, precocious and like her mama doesn't take any crap!  She pushes Red and Blue around and watches them to make sure they are doing what her mama tells them to do at the gym.  The other day, she popped Red in the back a couple of times, trying to get him out the door to go work out. It was so funny!  This pic is from one day when he burned 519 calories on the elliptical.  She made him carry her on his back as a sort of victory dance.

So as we're riding home from the gym last night, he turns to me and says,
"You know really are the best mom ever."
WTH?  Where did that come from?  Is he serious?  I look at him in disbelief.
"What makes you say that?"
"Because you always support me."
I really don't know what to do with this.  Is he just talking? Does he really mean what he's saying?
These are the words every mom lives her entire life to hear.  Does he REALLY see me?  Does he REALLY appreciate all that I am doing from him?  Could this boy who is ordinarily totally self-centered, truly mean what he's saying.'s really too bad that I have to question it's validity, but I'm just...shocked! 
I muster up a, "Thank you son." While a million thoughts run through my head.
'You're damned right I support you!  Thanks to me you have a Person Centered Planner (like a Life Coach), and she's not just any old one.  She's the best one in the entire school district!  You have a personal Video Teacher that I found for you through our Aspergers Meetup group.  You have job coaches, thanks to my advocating for you at school.  I just  sent you to L.A. to spend time with your family who loves, cares and supports you.  And now you have your very own personal trainer thanks to my friend!'

He has a grand village of people that are helping him to be the best he can be. His pastor picks him up for church every Sunday, mentors him, answers his phone calls, and comes to his Person Centered Planning meetings.  Our friends, all give him personal attention, pep talks and reality checks.  I have a great relationship with the Special Education Lead at his school.  She works hard to get him the support and programming that he needs there. Oh and his PCPlanner, is also an Administrator in the Special Education Department in our district.  I have a good relationship with her as well.  She is 100% in his corner.  This boy is blessed! And I work my ass off to keep it that way.

I hope that he really meant what he said about me being the best mom ever.  I will go ahead and think positively that he did.  Whatever the case may be, I know for that he is absolutely right.

I love to read your comments.