Monday, November 14, 2011

Dear Diary -It's My Turn

Overall...I am a very patient, giving person.  I delight in making other people happy...making them smile, feel loved, appreciated and cherished.  Sometimes, when I give and give...and then give some more, I end up feeling depleted.   That's where I am today.  That hormonal time of the month must be kicking in...because I just don't feel like hearing any of the needy, unappreciative little voices that are sucking the life out of me.  Some of those voices are not actually so little...meaning my mother and my husband.

Sunday starts off as a rather peaceful day.  Red leaves to go to church with a friend...Yay! Hubby leaves to go take eldest son to work.  Something is wrong with his car.  From there, he meets a friend to have lunch and go watch some football.  He is gone most of the day.

I enjoy a relatively quiet morning, watching church service on the internet, drinking coffee and playing Scrabble.

Red comes home from church and within a half-hour another friend shows up at our house.  This is a NEW friend from school.  The two of them are going to build a computer together that they are donating to the CAMP area where they hang out @ lunch time.  Now wouldn't it have been nice if our resident computer expert (Dad) had been here to support this positive effort? would be, but that isn't on his priority list for the day.  Oh well...the boys do the best that they can.  They seem to get along well.

God is answering "My Prayer" that I wrote last December.  Red has a new friend.  This delights him and makes me ecstatic.

After several hours, Red's friend goes home.  A half-hour later, Blue has a friend over.  They play video games boisterously, and hang out being silly together.  He's happy...I'm happy right?  After I prepare and serve dinner, I take his friend home.

During this time, that the boys have company,  my mother is more focused on the conversations between the boys in the next room, than she is on her own television shows that she's supposed to be watching.  She feels the need to make her own comments and interjections.  I want to tell her to watch her show and mind her own damn business.  I refrain.

Hubby finally makes his way home just as all the activity is dying down.  Somehow, he always manages to get away when the boys have any company in the house.  We haven't had an outburst all day long.  He's in the door for 5 minutes and he and Red are going at it.  There I go into my referee job.

By the end of the night I'm zonked.  I just want to crawl into my room and hide under the covers. I want to disappear into my Word's with Friends games online.  It's a cool way to play with your friends from the convenience of your very own bed.

Red comes in and wants to "talk" around 9:30 p.m.  I just have nothing left.  I ask him to please leave my room.  I just don't want to "talk" anymore.  I don't want to here the repetitive dialog.  I'm just done.  I muster up the energy to meet him in his room for prayer before he goes to sleep.

This morning I take them both to school.  Both of them are giving me a driving lecture.  Do either of them have a driver's license?  NO!  I have been driving for 30 years!  I tell them both, " If you don't like my can both can get out and walk!"

"'s just that Dad drives so much better than you."
"Then tell your Dad to take you to school and all of the other places I manage to get you to on a regular basis!"
"Why are you getting so mad?" They have the nerve to ask me.
"I'm in a bad mood.  Have you ever been in a bad mood?" I ask them.
"Well today is my turn."

They have all trampled all over my nerves.  I am thankful that today is Monday and they are at school trampling all over someone else's.

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