Blue comes home very upset yesterday after school. I know...what else is new right? He says to me, "This kid went on the computer and looked up my ID number! Then he yelled it out in front of all of these people! They all know my ID number and they were saying out loud. They're going to steal my lunch money!"
Who knew...there is a problem with identity theft in middle school?
This is the same kid I've talked about before...the Shoe Licking Kid. This kid just irritates the heck out of my boy. He knows for sure that he can get a pay off. If I say this...he will blow a gasket! Is he really bullying? Is he really trying to intimidate Blue. I don't really think so. He's just trying to be a pain int he ass and it's working.
According to Blue however, there are four of these kids who make an effort to tease and make fun of him in some way shape or form almost daily. "They come up to me and say these things to me while I'm trying to work. They distract me and make me feel uncomfortable. They make me feel like not coming to school everyday."
A big part of the issue for Blue is that he really would like to control his environment to include other people's behavior. He does this at home with his brother. He has to chime in on every single action his brother takes. It's really like he can't control himself. He brings attention to himself at school by playing this role of SuperCop. My husband was there for a meeting once and he saw it in action. He sees a bunch of kids horsing around outside. He yells, "Hey you kids! Cut that out!" Totally...none of his business. Yet, he really can not see that this plays any part in kids making him a target. He just feels that it's unfair that they treat him this way.
I validate and understand his feelings. I don't want these kids making him feel bad. He says to me last night, "I just need someone to help me. I need someone to be on my side. I just want to do my work without anyone bothering me." All I could say is, "I understand." Whenever I try to address the issue of the role that he plays...he gets angry with me.
He does have a right to go to school and be comfortable and not have to worry about creepy kids coming up to him and saying irritating things. I just don't know how much of that can actually be controlled. They are not threatening him...or intimidating him, but they are still making him feel bad.
He made an incident report this morning about the identification theft. He wrote an excellent review of the situation. "I've have various incidences with this student." He's tired of it. Quite frankly, so am I.
Adelaide Dupont · 285 weeks ago
And for those of us who knew and appreciated these points in high school to a greater or lesser extent - always good to have a refresher and feel them through the current and future generations who we survived to be able to see.
I especially appreciated points 5, 7 and 10.
And young women not settling or settling down yet is a good thing.
"It's never too late to live our dreams" - but it may be too early for some of them!
And 8 of course.
nicole · 243 weeks ago
Risa · 230 weeks ago
LAH · 221 weeks ago
Maira L. Coral · 216 weeks ago
I was looking for information for my Multi-Genre Disability Research Project from my Early Childhood Special Education class on the web, when suddenly I came across your blog. I started reading this out of curiosity and I want to tell you that as you said yourself, you will not be Amanda Gorman, but you managed to make me shed some tears, perhaps because I felt totally identified with your words, especially in the part that you speak of your son. My son also has Asperger's syndrome, he is 19 years old and he is in the second semester of College. Also like yours, he takes classes from home, likewise my eldest daughter is also taking college classes from her room. At the same time, that I work as a preschool teacher from my kitchen through a computer, my husband sleeps in the room during the day because he works at night. Also in the afternoons I myself take virtual school classes. I am a 51-year-old Latin woman who began to learn the English language as adult, so maybe you find some deficiencies in my writing, however, I was very moved by how proud you express yourself about your son. Referent your mother, I liked the humorous tone that you give when your talk about her, so I did not want to miss this opportunity and stopped my assignments for a moment to let you know that your words do make a difference, since they reach the heart of at least those who have opportunity to read you. I want confess you that is the most long I have written to someone I don't know, because your words inspired me, thank you...
Gavin Bollard · 209 weeks ago
Thanks for this post. I've been very distracted of late and so this was how I found out about our friend Kate. Kate's struggles were very real but they were so constant and so wide-ranging that it was difficult for people around her to address them. I think it's going to take a while longer for me to process all this.
I learned so much from Kate because she was always quick to point out the many injustices in the world. In her glory days, she was very much a crusader and she cared for everyone. Over the years, as her situation took its toll, I came to realise that it was the fact that she couldn't be put in a single specific category, that made the system fail her. She needed help that they weren't set up to provide.
She needed more care and she needed to be less alone. I'm so sorry that this has happened.
For a long while we were corresponding almost every day but a couple of months ago, I realised that she had become so stressed that nearly every interaction I had with her was starting to trigger her. I backed away to give her a bit more space. She only had a little time that she could stand to be online and there were too many things that she wanted to do in that time. I thought that by taking a step back, she could reach out to more people who might be geographically closer and able to assist.
Kate was a beautiful soul and she will be sorely missed by all of us.
diyalabs6192603 11p · 192 weeks ago
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Spoil your cat · 122 weeks ago
Many of these living arrangement aren't good, and many of the people who run those places really don't have the residents' best interest at heart. Those places are like old age homes and foster homes, where you sometimes hear horror stories. They're hard to trust. But then there are good ones, of course.
The best thing for an autistic adult is either to go on living at home or working and renting an apartment and living independently, but that isn't always an option.
Duncan · 112 weeks ago