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| I made this for my husband for Valentines Day |
By the way, Blue is off to the mall with a friend, for the first time --ALONE, no adult supervision. My husband and mother are extremely nervous about this. For some reason, I am not. He is extremely responsible...such a rule follower. I know that he will not only be o.k. but he will make sure his buddy stays in line as well. Besides, he has his cell phone and I have him check in with me every 30 to 45 minutes on this 2 hour trip to the mall.
He does fine as I knew he would. In fact, he comes home with a present for me and Nana (my mother). He bought me some rare kind of stone in the "Earthbound" store. I tell you...I love this kid! He is extremely thoughtful, especially for someone who has Aspergers. It almost makes me wonder if his diagnosis is correct. He is definitely somewhere on the spectrum, but he is so different from his brother who absolutely only thinks about himself.
Back to my date...hubby meets me at the coffee house. We have an uninterrupted conversation. It's great. We leave my car behind and he takes me to Pappadeaux, a New Orleans style seafood restaurant. We sit at the bar. He has a beer. I have a healthy pour of white wine. We chat, watch sports, and have scrumptious appetizers...like real grown-ups. This is a simple pleasure that feels like a luxurious indulgence because we don't get it often. I am thankful for this moment.
Being the parents of two Aspie boys adds a lot of stress to our relationship. You can loose your identity as a person and definitely as a couple. We have to work hard to avoid this pitfall.
We come home and everyone is nearly asleep. The two of us stay up late ...watching a movie together. Another thing that we just don't get to do often anymore. Again -a simple pleasure that makes me realize that we can still enjoy each other as adults, as a couple ...as grown-ups.
I really need your clicks for Top Mommy...my numbers are dropping into oblivion which is directly related to my identity and self-esteam :-D
Logging you in...
Adelaide Dupont · 285 weeks ago
And for those of us who knew and appreciated these points in high school to a greater or lesser extent - always good to have a refresher and feel them through the current and future generations who we survived to be able to see.
I especially appreciated points 5, 7 and 10.
And young women not settling or settling down yet is a good thing.
"It's never too late to live our dreams" - but it may be too early for some of them!
And 8 of course.
nicole · 243 weeks ago
Risa · 230 weeks ago
LAH · 221 weeks ago
Maira L. Coral · 216 weeks ago
I was looking for information for my Multi-Genre Disability Research Project from my Early Childhood Special Education class on the web, when suddenly I came across your blog. I started reading this out of curiosity and I want to tell you that as you said yourself, you will not be Amanda Gorman, but you managed to make me shed some tears, perhaps because I felt totally identified with your words, especially in the part that you speak of your son. My son also has Asperger's syndrome, he is 19 years old and he is in the second semester of College. Also like yours, he takes classes from home, likewise my eldest daughter is also taking college classes from her room. At the same time, that I work as a preschool teacher from my kitchen through a computer, my husband sleeps in the room during the day because he works at night. Also in the afternoons I myself take virtual school classes. I am a 51-year-old Latin woman who began to learn the English language as adult, so maybe you find some deficiencies in my writing, however, I was very moved by how proud you express yourself about your son. Referent your mother, I liked the humorous tone that you give when your talk about her, so I did not want to miss this opportunity and stopped my assignments for a moment to let you know that your words do make a difference, since they reach the heart of at least those who have opportunity to read you. I want confess you that is the most long I have written to someone I don't know, because your words inspired me, thank you...
Gavin Bollard · 209 weeks ago
Thanks for this post. I've been very distracted of late and so this was how I found out about our friend Kate. Kate's struggles were very real but they were so constant and so wide-ranging that it was difficult for people around her to address them. I think it's going to take a while longer for me to process all this.
I learned so much from Kate because she was always quick to point out the many injustices in the world. In her glory days, she was very much a crusader and she cared for everyone. Over the years, as her situation took its toll, I came to realise that it was the fact that she couldn't be put in a single specific category, that made the system fail her. She needed help that they weren't set up to provide.
She needed more care and she needed to be less alone. I'm so sorry that this has happened.
For a long while we were corresponding almost every day but a couple of months ago, I realised that she had become so stressed that nearly every interaction I had with her was starting to trigger her. I backed away to give her a bit more space. She only had a little time that she could stand to be online and there were too many things that she wanted to do in that time. I thought that by taking a step back, she could reach out to more people who might be geographically closer and able to assist.
Kate was a beautiful soul and she will be sorely missed by all of us.
diyalabs6192603 11p · 192 weeks ago
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Spoil your cat · 122 weeks ago
Many of these living arrangement aren't good, and many of the people who run those places really don't have the residents' best interest at heart. Those places are like old age homes and foster homes, where you sometimes hear horror stories. They're hard to trust. But then there are good ones, of course.
The best thing for an autistic adult is either to go on living at home or working and renting an apartment and living independently, but that isn't always an option.
Duncan · 112 weeks ago