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Thursday, April 7, 2011

Happy Birthday to Me

It has become a tradition in our home.  Every birthday...no matter who we are celebrating -is all about Red. I've said before when he was younger -he would throw a fit on his brother's birthday.  When he got a little older -he would sing, "Happy Birthday to Me".  Last year on my birthday, he sat silently on the couch as the rest of the family gathered around to sing to me.  This year was no different.

This year, our neighbors -friends we have known since we moved here 11 years ago, surprised me by stopping by the house to sing "Happy Birthday."  It was so sweet and thoughtful.  I used to take care of these children everyday after school when they were in kindergarten and 3rd Grade.  Now G- is a junior getting ready for the prom and driving, and D.J. is in the 8th grade!  This gesture really made my day.

As they got ready to leave, G -who has grown into a gorgeous young lady says, "Where's Red?  I want to say good-bye."

He was in the kitchen actually crying -real tears.  Did it make him so sad that they came over to pay tribute to me?  Wow!  I couldn't believe it.  He pulled himself together so that G- could give him a hug and say good-bye.  I deflected from myself to tell them that Red was planning on trying out for the talent show at school.  They were of course thrilled for him and said they would love to come and support him.  I hoped that my gesture would pull him out of his funk.

After they left, we sat down to have dinner.  He sat on the couch and started with the crying again.  I asked if he would join us at the table in prayer.  He said no of course.  I guilted him into it and he finally did.  I said a special prayer for him.

"Dear Lord -thank you for all of the blessings of this day.  For the cards, flowers, notes, phone calls and outpouring of love from all of my friends and family.  I like to give special thanks to the Moore family who reached out in a loving way by stopping by tonight.  For my friend Tona for taking me out to lunch today. And for all of the love that my immediate family has given me tonight.  I say a special prayer for Red.  That he will feel the love of everyone at this table who loves and supports him.  That he will be able to look at the positives in his life and feel good about himself."

Throughout dinner -Red attempted to dominate the conversation.  I tell him, "We are only going to talk about positive things during my birthday dinner." We had to continuously interject to keep the conversation positive.  By the end of dinner -he started to yell about the parental controls on his computer -that he wouldn't have enough time to work on his projects.  Although, he had spent the majority of his time during the evening complaining, and talking instead of using his computer time.

After he finally went upstairs, Blue says to me, "I can't believe he ruined your birthday."

To which I reply, "He didn't ruin my birthday.  He could only ruin my birthday if I gave him the power to do so.  I didn't give him that power.  I choose to look at all of the positives of this day.  No one can ruin your day unless you let them."

Happy Birthday to Me!

BTW...I have to give a special shout out to my husband who did EVERYTHING to make my birthday special.  He drove me to Houston to have lunch with my best friend, while he had a business meeting.  And on my special day -he bought me a Michael Jackson cupcake (black and white) among many other special gestures.  God Bless him -he's learning after 19 years together.  His contract has been renewed for another year!

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