Friday, September 30, 2011

Aspergers + Change =

The alarm sounds off...he crosses the room to turn it off and crawls back into bed.  I enter the room a few minutes later he is dead to the world...back into a deep slumber.  I tap him gently, "Good's the field trip.  Time to get up."
"I changed my mind.  I don't want to go." His eyes are still closed as he speaks in a drunken slur.
"Well...that's not really an option.  Come on wake up."  His eyes do not budge.
"Can I have a hug?" I ask.  His eyes flicker.  Hmm...I have his interest.  He still loves a hug from his mama.  This actually gets him to open his eyes slightly.
"I need help to get up," he says as he reaches towards me.
I take his hand.  There is no way that I can really help lift his enormous body.  He pulls himself up and gives me a hug.  I scratch his back and his scalp briefly, trying to give him sensory stimuli to help him wake up.  Finally...he is awake.

I've been in stress and panic mode for the past three weeks really.  Having him change campuses within the district was put on the table in our last ARD/IEP meeting.  The word change and Aspergers teen within the same sentence is a recipe for explosion and disaster.  The very thought of this possibility has had him on edge for the past 2 weeks.  This tension and being on edge looks better than it did last spring where he would have been screaming and I'll count my blessing for that.

We finally have the big ARD/IEP meeting yesterday.  He walks into the room full adults, administrators and teachers and immediately lets everyone there know he definitely does not want to go to that other school and all of the reasons why.  He punctuates his thoughts with, "That school is ghetto!"  Of course he has no idea what "ghetto" really is.  Because this suburban school is definitely not that.  It is his home campus...the school that his older brother graduated from.  Last night I ask him, "So does that mean your brother is ghetto...because he played football and graduated from there?"
" HE isn't.  But a lot of kids there are."

Of course this is his own quirky perception along with a few extremely negative comments coming from a friend.  Does this friend go said school? No.  Does he even go to high school? No.  So how does he know how "Ghetto" this school is?  He doesn't...but of course, he has Red convinced.

The meeting totally sucks!  The ARD/IEP Coordinator is rude and abrupt.  She starts off by letting us all know how little time we have to get this done (less than 45 minutes).  The special education teacher races through the FBA (functional behavior analysis) and testing results so fast I couldn't see straight. Of course, I interject with several questions that I'm not sure were ever answered to any level of satisfaction.  My husband is sitting there basically, Mr. Happy-go-lucky schmoozer that he is.  He does ask for them to step up and get Red some reading supports.  We are not happy with his academic progress at all.  At the end, the Coordinator abruptly tries to end the meeting while the Special Education Lead from his home campus is still trying to speak.  I want to reach across the table and slap her.

I leave the meeting not agreeing to anything.  I sign that I was in attendence but do not fully understand everything that was presented.  I have 5 school days to get back to them with any changes that I want. Boy do I want changes!  I am so done with this school...and last night after a pretty good sales job on my part with Red, I think he may be done as well.

Stay tuned...I don't want to say right now exactly what our game plan is because I don't want to jinx anything.  Let's suffice it to say...things are looking up and I am hopeful.

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