This was a stress that I didn't want or need. The situation would be comical if it weren't so sad. He is so naive, and lacks so much common sense. I keep wondering how he had a 4.0 through out high school. Did they give him the grades because he was a football player? We've all been 21 and made mistakes...but this boy takes the cake! I mean you spend your whole life raising him, trying to give him the best possible environment, the best schools, a full-time mother, a hard working, ethical, honest father. Yet makes choices like he was raised by village idiots! I hoped that the majority of our parenting was done -but it never ends unless you cut it short. We have stop helping him so that he can bite his nose to spite his face, and then pray that it hurts bad enough to teach him some difficult life lessons.
So I'm at the climax of my yoga class in down dog, hopefully the last one before savasana (meditation where you clear your mind and take in all of the poses that you've just completed). The door opens and somehow I know. "Is there a Karen W- in this class? Her husband is on the phone -he says it's an emergency." Shit! Did one of the kids get hurt? I hope it's not anything serious. I get up from down dog and answer the phone. My friends are all concerned when I return for my mat and blanket. "Is there anything we can do?" I'm touched by this. Of course the answer is, "No -I'll be fine."
I hall ass over to the pool to pick up my children and their friends who have been kicked out of the facility because Kendal was using curse words at a couple of young ladies. Wonderful. Isn't my life just freakin wonderful? When I arrive which is literally five minutes later. The boys run towards the car screaming and upset that they were all kicked out when they didn't do anything. Of course Kendal claims it wasn't his fault. The girls dropped the F-bomb on him first.
I verify the story with the head life-guard. It's true the girls did curse at him first, but he over reacted and his volume was turned on loudspeaker. I can only imagine the whole scene as other parents of small children nearby are horrified by his behavior. A few of them chime in their two cents, which is like adding fire-crackers to a smoldering flame. The crescendo was being disrespectful to any adult who crossed his path. Once you set off a kid with Asperger's...it takes time and patience to rain him back in. He has to get away from the situation, calm down. Then of course he is apologetic for his behavior, angry and self loathing because of his lack of control.
The natural consequence is that he is suspended from city pools for one week. I added that he will not attend a public pool with out my presence until I can be assured of self-control, which is never. From now on he will swim at our local pool or another pool where we have membership and I will be present. So much for inner-peace.
BTW -one might ask, "Why didn't your husband go and handle the situation instead of calling you out of your class? What was he doing was he too far away?" When we got home -he was laying across the bed watching the All-star game. His reason for not going was that he was too stressed out after dealing with "21" earlier in the day. Mind you...he made one phone call to our son. I talked to him, texted him half a dozen times then followed up with the creditor.
This is why I don't work outside of home. These boys -even the one that's out of the house, are more than a full-time job.
Namaste'
